Republican Candidates

Look my friends...how can you possibly think that the candidates being offered by the Republican Party are fit to be the President of the United States? Let's be honest.. it is a disgrace. How in the world did this happen? Old Geezer Brown at Rabbit's Creek knows more and he's more presentable. I mean, people like Geezer! There has to be a reason that serious candidates are waiting this one out.
If you want to be a candidate this time around all you have to know is crazy talk. That's right, just come up with a very stupid idea and you'll rise to the top. Something like...Oh, "I going to form a space alien posse so we can catch aliens from outer space to work our farms". Something like that, although my suggestion might seem a little tame or one of these people might already have it in their platform. I'd like to add to this but what else is there to say?